Posted by: charityliz | October 4, 2011

Seeds of Change

The smell of Fall is in the air and we had our first Autumn rain of the season in San Francisco yesterday.  And oddly enough, the changing weather season seems to be synchronized with changes in my own life.

Now for the most part, I’m a split-personality when it comes to change. On one hand, I love changes that are something like a good adventure,  a new and fabulous friend, meeting/dating someone fun and interesting,  striving for a new goal, or discovering a faster way to get to work.  And on the other hand, I can really resist and struggle through change—like when I first left my home of 18 years to go to college, or when I was forced to start using a Mac at work instead of a PC, or when I had to completely stop walking for several months to recover from an ankle injury.

Change is inevitable, like the seasons. And yet it’s such a tricky thing to manage sometimes.

I think of my dear friend, Devon, who is truly someone who appreciates and celebrates seasons changing.  With each new season, she’s ready to dive in with the wardrobe must-haves and the latest little additions of home décor. As I’m writing this, I’m sure she’s already added her seasonal pumpkins or gourds to her kitchen table centerpiece–meanwhile, I’m mourning the fact that I have to put my swimsuits and summer dresses away for the next nine months.

But I learned a bit about coping with change when I lived with Devon, as my roommate.  I think it was Devon’s Mom who gave her a little gift during a particular season that had been marked with a lot of challenging changes.  The gift was a simple canning jar filled with bird seed, with a label that said seeds of change.  I’m still not quite sure what exactly that was supposed to mean, but I remember Devon and I getting such satisfaction out of pointing to that jar every time we were going through significant changes, and with a big sigh, declaring “seeds of change.”  Somehow it allowed us to just accept the change for what it was – no real explanation as to why the change was necessary, or even how long it would last.  Just a simple recognition that, indeed, change was and is inevitable.

And today, I find myself sighing a few times, just to declare that change is happening in my life—be it good or bad.

This last weekend, I celebrated a baby shower with my old friends in SLO and realized how much I miss being part of their daily lives, especially as many of them are having babies and their lives are changing significantly.  Reminiscent sigh – Seeds of change.

Yesterday, I took my usual walk at lunch, but this time it started raining on me and instead of running back inside, I just kept walking…and it kinda felt good to just walk in the rain!   I hope that I’m finally learning to love, or at least tolerate the San Francisco weather.  Hopeful sigh –  Seeds of change.

Though God is granting us strength, watching my Mom battle cancer is definitely a change from the relatively carefree and fun Romano family life. Heavy sigh – Seeds of change.

Last week, I joined a few new (and delightful) friends to watch the New Girl TV show together, and we’ve officially deemed Wednesday nights as our “New Girl” night.  I love these new friends and the meaningless diversion of watching TV together.  I now look forward to Wednesday nights even more than Friday nights! Ha!  Grateful sigh – Seeds of change.

After months of pushing through the challenges and demands that come with transitioning to a new job, I’m finally starting to feel like work is happening at a normal pace.  Sigh of relief – Seeds of change.

Tonight I said goodbye to a friend who’s leaving for France for the school year, and I’m going to miss hanging out with him.  Sad sigh – Seeds of change.

To avoid seeming depressed, let me just say — for me, extroverting all of how I’m feeling  and letting out a few sighs along the way, is part of embracing the change for all its pleasant and not-so-pleasant effects.

And as usual, I find that God, in His infinite wisdom, already has this all figured out…

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:

2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
6 a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
8 a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

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Responses

  1. Wow, Charity, I hear your voice when you write, and it is so personal and refreshing. Thank you for being such a big part of my life and helping me through this season of change. You are a blessing beyond words.

    Yes, enjoy the rain in SF, cuz you never know, you might end up in the desert again someday!

    MOM

  2. Thanks, Mom. It’s hard to believe that I’ve come such a long way — literally and figuratively– from those years in the desert. Not only am I learning to cope with change a bit better than the girl that almost called it quits after the first few months away at college…but, I live closer to the ocean (and a bay) than I ever imagined during those dry, dry years in the desert. Heck! I barely even have to wear lotion anymore — or at least if I forget, my skin doesn’t crack and dry up in a matter of hours. 😉

  3. Charity, I have long believed in seasons of change, The verse in Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 used to be sung by a group called the Animals (now I’m really dating myself) back in the 60’s, But it is so true.Life is change. When we cease to change we die either spiritually or physically. That is why I tend to embrace change. For me it is part of growing; like a tree when it brings forth leaves it is alive on the outside, when they fall it is still alive on the inside. I think God changes us the most spiritually in those winter seasons as he prepares us to bring forth fruit – physically – in the summer seasons.

    So, I agree with your mom, enjoy the rain! Enjoy each and every season that the Lord brings you through. Take time for the little pleasures, See God in the small things, the simple things, the everyday taken for granted things.

    For
    “Whatsoever things are true,
    Whatsoever things are honest,
    Whatsoever things are just,
    Whatsoever things are pure,
    whatsoever things are lovely,
    whatsoever things are of good report;
    if there be any virtue,
    and if there be any praise,
    think on these things.”

    Philippians 4:8 KJV

    This verse was one of my favorite songs that we sung in Alaska.

    DAD

  4. You can bring your swimsuits and summer dresses to Arizona. No season change here, and let me tell you it’s a bummer. Embrace the change!! 😉

    • Sara, until you’ve experienced a full year of the desert, you don’t know what seasons are. I remember beautiful falls, crisp and invigorating air, biting cold winds in the winter, and glorious spring flowers that make you sneeze—but they are gorgeous!

      Seasons are done in context….

      Hope you enjoy these new ones.
      Eileen

  5. Charity,
    I am so pleased you are the young woman that the Lord has made of you. Enjoy the season of change through it, we grow, spiritually, emotionally and become stronger because of the challenges presented to us.

    Enjoy the rain, and don’t forget to jump in the puddles. I agree with your folks comments.


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