Posted by: charityliz | October 4, 2013

adventures in name-changing

Like most girls I know [who like to think of themselves as modern and independent, but deep down have a soft spot for old-fashioned traditions], when it came to getting married and changing my name, I always just assumed I’d take on the lucky-guy’s last name. Unless, of course, it was something that sounded awful with my first name, like, say…. "Kase". Luckily this was not a problem. Nevertheless I was surprised to realize how much emotion came up when I actually needed to sign on the dotted line and decide if I would drop my beloved last name – FOREVER! I mean, it almost felt like abandoning a form of my identity, namely the part of me that gets to claim all the cool Italian-American stereotypes. My husband-to-be even encouraged me to think about keeping my name and just adding his with a hyphen. Eventually though, I found my "center" again and realized that I had always wanted to change my last name as a symbol of my new and lasting connection to another soul for life. And so I changed it.

And [cue romantic music] they all lived happily ever after. The end. 😀

NOT!

Now as I’m dealing with the aftermath of that decision (i.e. trips to the social security and DVM offices, and countless calls to various vendors), I’m finally beginning to truly consider what this new name is all about. And don’t ask me why I didn’t think to do this any sooner, but today was the first day that I actually googled my new name. And I found that which I least expected…

an aspiring model.

Yep. Just what I need. Not just someone to share my name, but someone who has effectively staked her claim with our name on every possible social media and marketing site out there– just waiting for that big break! Creating a new email address with what I thought would be a unique name? — forget it! She’s already got that address plus a somewhat suggestive photo to go along with it!

Loving Disclaimer: This post in no way signifies my feelings about my budding marriage. I still love my dear husband and wouldn’t trade his name for anything (including even more trips to those horribly inefficient government offices). 😉

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Responses

  1. Someday you will forget you ever had the other name…my maiden name seems so foreign to me now. I can’t remember when the “forgetting” happened, but I realized it when I almost forgot how to spell my maiden name!

  2. Speaking of maiden names, Mom…just met a graduate of Loara today at the Riverside Greek Fest while serving her souvlaki. Graduated in ’71. It took me a moment to think of your maiden name, but I did come through 🙂

    Charity, that aspiring model seems to share your good sense: ” I’m going to be 45 some day. I’ll need to make money even when I don’t have a younglooking face. You get to a certain age, and you’re Mom in the Sears catalog.”

    I think it’s beautiful the way you describe the significance of a name change. Thanks for sharing!

    • Now that is FUNNY!

  3. Soon it (your maiden name) will seem so trivial; sad to hear about the other charity. hard to get anything done when feds are shut down.
    hope you are settled into your new home with pictures hung, closets lined and kitchen set the way you want it.
    love you

  4. You are so eloquent and FUNNY. we are working on the wedding album. sorry it is taking so long to complete but I want it to be perfect.

    >________________________________ > From: latitude37 >To: poudmayer@yahoo.com >Sent: Friday, October 4, 2013 5:21 PM >Subject: [New post] adventures in name-changing > > WordPress.com >charityliz posted: “Like most girls I know [who like to think of themselves as modern and independent, but deep down have a soft spot for old-fashioned traditions], when it came to getting married and changing my name, I always just assumed I’d take on the lucky-guy’s last n” >

  5. Charity, we are the same way! I squeeze from the middle. Michael from the end. It irritates him 🙂 What are we gonna do with our OCD husbands 🙂 We got one of those plastic things that go on the end of the tube to keep it pushed up. That way I can squeeze from the center and it doesn’t distribute the toothpaste unevenly. Ha ha!


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